Bear Dream

Oct. 7th, 2010 12:07 am
ulfrvif: Stylized, Nordic wolf head. (Default)
My mate and I were walking along a two-lane road through the woods. Soon, we reached the edge of a small town. We approached a couple of kids, and they pointed out a mother black bear and her three young cubs. The mother and one of the cubs was in a yard eating berries from a bush near a house. The two other cubs were on the other side of the road, afraid to walk across the hard pavement.

I slowly made my way across the street, around some trees and shrubs, and got behind the two cubs. I waved my arms in the air and made loud noises. The cubs became more afraid of me and joined their mother and sibling. I was content and found myself back and my mate's side. We watched the bears quietly, but the mother was becoming nervous as more people gathered around.

She began to lead her cubs away from the house when a crowd of people arrived. This part of the dream was less clear, but these people must have harassed and frightened her. They didn't want her near the town. I think she had started for the woods on the other side of a field. She was leaving, but the people continued to follow her, yelling and screaming. They went too far. She must have turned around and charged at them because she felt the need to protect herself and her cubs. I know that no human was harmed. Her charge was brief before she turned and ran for the woods again, following her cubs. But a man had a gun. He shot her in the back of the head.

I was horrified at what was happening. So many people were yelling and screaming. The man that shot her saddled his horse. He tied a rope around her neck, and disrespectfully dragged her body back to the yard. Other people patted him on the back, congratulating him, and thanking him. I was disgusted. How could they brag about what they had done?

This innocent bear was dead. Her cubs were alone and would probably starve. I was beginning to cry as I stared at the limb body, which had been filled with life and love. She had only been feeding her family and trying to protect them. I stared at the bloody hole in her head. I saw the shattered skull. I was crying as I walked over to her. I kneeled down next to the body. I hugged her and ran my fingers through her fur. I closed her eyes. Many of the people around me were confused at my actions, but I felt like my own mother had been killed. I didn't care what they thought.

Thankfully, not all of the people there were celebrating the bear's death. Natives had arrived. They were moved by my tears. They brought offerings, moved the bear to a proper location, and began to build a pyre around her. Drummers and dancers appeared. They began to dance and sing. The man responsible for the bear's death and many other people wandered away, thinking the ceremony was silly. I watched as the body burned into the night, my mate holding me close and offering me comfort.

Near the end of the dream a strange man walked over to me. He looked mostly white, but I understand that the Natives respected him for his knowledge, beliefs, and way of living, which was similar to their own. He looked me in the eye. His voice was sincere. “There aren't many people like you left in the world who feel connected to the animals. And the time you've spent with wolves truly makes your spirit unique. Don't forget that.” He slowly walked away. I had never seen this man before. How did he know about the wolves?

The Natives continued to dance and sing to the drums. The fire continued to burn, setting the bear's spirit free from the physical body. My dream faded into blackness, then gray, and I slowly woke up. The dream was vivid and left me with a strange feeling. It was very powerful and emotional. I suppose its lesson and meaning will reveal themselves to me on a future date.
ulfrvif: Stylized, Nordic wolf head. (Default)
Saturday night I dreamed of a horse. He was a very light brown, almost white, or what would be considered a "flea-bitten" coloration. He was very strong and spirited. In the beginning of the dream, even as he grazed in the field, a mischievous, playful sparkle was in his eyes. When need be, this horse was calm and well-mannered. It seemed as if he was always aware of  my presence and location. He seemed careful and caution of his strength because he didn't want to harm me when I was near him.

As the dream progressed, something happened and this amazing creature became sick. My efforts to give him good hay and food failed. I gripped his head and halter, desperately trying to make him swallow medicine. But nothing worked.

My family stands in the field on a sunny day, but I stand at a distance from them, alone and sad. The horse is gone. The field is empty. Then a man appears. I have never seen him before, and I don't know his name. If I recall correctly, his hair is dark brown. His jacket and clothing are more like that of a soldier, maybe from the 18th century, but it was definitely not modern. The man was calm and had gentle, caring eyes. He approached me and might have rested a hand on my arm or shoulder. Although he did not speak, he seemed to be communicating feelings to me, and he understood how I felt. However, I refused to be comforted at that time.

When the man moved away, he rested in the grass a short distance away. He motioned silently with a hand, asking me to come over to him. I was still standing, head held low with the burden of sadness and guilt at the horse's death. But I was growing tired. I finally lifted my head a little and glanced at the stranger in the grass, who was watching me with warm, un-judging eyes.

I slowly moved towards him. As I did, my pain and regret began to lift. With each step I felt better. My muscles, which had been tense and stiff, began to relax. I went down to my knees, felt the soft grass beneath my hands, and I rested my head on the man's chest. He put an arm around me, and I felt as if everything was okay. I felt as if all were forgiven. I closed my eyes. I felt comfortable and safe, and I fell asleep. My dream ended peacefully.

The horse in my dream was named Thunder. For many years he was a real friend to me. On December 17, 2008, I watched him die. It was a long and painful battle with colic. I can't imagine the pain Thunder felt. I admit, I still carry some sadness and guilt. I regret that I did not care for him more properly or give him more of my time and attention. But maybe there is no real reason to feel that way. Perhaps the man in my dream was Thunder in a human form, giving me comfort. I would like to believe this. The man did seem to have a strong connection to the grass and the earth. He was unafraid to be on the ground, and seemed very familiar with it and the grass. Also, the entire dream took place outside in the field that Thunder knew well.

It crosses my mind that the man could also be the wolf spirit that often appears in my dreams. He could have also taken human form to give me comfort after Thunder's death. But I don't think the man had the same type of energy that the wolf usually does. It felt different. I feel as if it's more likely that the man was the horse's spirit.

I also wonder why he was dressed in older clothing. It brings to mind a legend I might have heard a long time ago. I think it was about brave soldiers being reborn as horses in the next life. Perhaps the spirit learned and experienced what he needed to as a horse. After becoming aware of that, maybe the spirit returned in my dream to let me know that I shouldn't be sad any more. I can put some of my negative feelings and memories to rest. I hope that's true. I do feel as if I have another spirit and friend watching over me, and I am thankful for the pleasant ending of the dream.

Wolf Daughter
March 29, 2009

The Cave

Aug. 19th, 2008 11:10 pm
ulfrvif: Stylized, Nordic wolf head. (Default)
My dream from last night still has me wondering about all the symbolism and meaning that was possibly included. It is a dream that I will think about often in the days, weeks, and possibly months to come.

I don't remember all of the dream. The first half is unclear or forgotten. I know I was in a Native American village. An elder or shaman was guiding me through the village. He pointed out objects, herbs, and other things which were important as we walked. I might have met several people, but I only remember the warrior. After we had met, he began to follow the shaman and me.

The day was sunny with a few clouds, and a gentle breeze rustled the leaves of the nearby oak trees. The seasons were changing, like they are now, and fall was approaching.

The shaman led me and the warrior to a river. A canoe waited there for us. The warrior stepped in first and took up a paddle. It was his duty to ensure my safe journey. I also got into the canoe, but the shaman was not going with us. He pointed at a cave nearby that went deep into the opposite bank. 

The shaman said, "To understand the meaning of life and to know your true self, you must first die and be reborn. You must go there and face your fears."

The warrior began to paddle across the river towards the cave. As we entered and the light faded, the dream came to an end.

I don't think the shaman was refering to an actual death. Entering the cave is more likely symbolic, like a vision quest. It is a time of reflection. I agree with the shaman that I have fears which I need to face. They are holding me back and keeping me from having as fulfilled a life as possible. Some little fears are faced each and every day. But I know of some larger fears that will come later in the future. They all have a proper time at which I will need to confront them.

Wolf Daughter 
August 19, 2008

ulfrvif: Stylized, Nordic wolf head. (Default)
This dream began at college, in class, with some people that I know. Later, we were at the beach, and that's when it got a little strange. I walked away from the others and was exploring the beach. Many people were there swimming and playing, doing ordinary activities. I changed into a wolf, and no one seemed to notice as I walked along, heading up a large dune.

As I approached the top, the sand didn't feel the same under my feet. I lowered my nose to the ground and smelled a terrible odor. Flocks of seagulls and other birds clearly stayed there often. The sand was covered with their feces. It made me uneasy and hesitant, but I moved forward. At the top of the dune, I saw a bird on its nest. I wanted to chase it, but I stopped myself. Something wasn't right. The bird should have been more alert, and it should have flown away. I was able to get a little closer and saw that the bird was malformed and sick. I kept my distance and moved on.

A few other interesting events occurred on the beach, but I don't want this description to be too long. So I will skip to the part where the dream environment changed. I was now running along a paved road through some woods. I startled a deer and once again wanted to take chase. But something told me not to as it leaped deeper into the trees, away from the road. I think the deer might have also seemed a little sick, like the bird.

As I continued to run, the trees became smaller. They appeared to be young, but I think it was because the soil was bad, not allowing them to grow properly. A large truck, loaded with recently cut trees, entered the road ahead of me. The sounds it made frightened me. The fumes from the truck, of diesel and grease, filled my nose. I coughed and felt choked. I was saddened by the sight, but kept running. Even though the truck disappeared, the smells lingered in the air. Something also wasn't right about the trees and plants. They all looked unhealthy. I began to feel scared and unsure of where I was.

That's when a large black wolf appeared from the woods. He took the lead in front of me, and I had confidence in him. I recognized this wolf as my spirit guide, who has appeared in many of my dreams before. I stayed close to him, pushing myself to run faster when I fell behind. I didn't want to loose my guide. I needed to show him that I could keep up with his pace.

The road became rough and deteriorated. There was no longer forest to either side. It has been replaced by thick growth of brambles and weeds, as if the land had been clear-cut. As I followed my guide, we started to meet sad, dejected wolves along the way. Each was curled up tightly on the ground, as if they had lost their will to live and were simply waiting to die.

Each time we came to one, my guide would touch his muzzle to the other and lick the wolf, encouraging it to get up. My guide was trying to restore their spirits, and he was asking them to join us. Soon, a pack had formed behind me as we ran and followed the black wolf.

But the landscape grew increasingly dark. It wasn't ordinary clouds that kept the sun from shining. It was smog and filth that filled the air. The ground turned to slick mud. All the plants were wilted and on the verge of death, struggling to live in the putrid environment. At this point, my guide slowed his pace. He carefully stepped on leaves, remaining patches of grass, and anything that helped keep his feet from sinking deep into the mud. "Watch your step," he warned us. "The ground here is poison."

We continued forward slowly. I don't know our destination. I don't know why we were in such a place. Perhaps it was our duty to find the source of the pollutants and try healing the land.

I've also thought that the landscape might reflect something inside of myself that needs to be cleansed and healed. But there is hope in my dream. In previous dreams when my guide had appeared, I had been unable to follow him to where he was going. This time I was able to run and keep up with him. But I also shouldn't ignore the warning he gave me. I need to be cautious and watch my step.

Wolf Daughter
July 19, 2008

Wolf Mother

May. 1st, 2008 10:35 pm
ulfrvif: Stylized, Nordic wolf head. (Default)
I keep thinking about a dream I had last night.

I was with my Mom and her parents. Being with my family starts out pleasant enough. I think we have gathered to eat lunch, but at some point things start to feel strange to me. After eating, we are walking outside. A sunny day begins to turn cloudy. A couple stray dogs come into the yard. One attacks me, but I growl and fight back. When things settle down, I realize I've been wrestling with an adolescent wolf.

A think heavy fog rolls into the yard. It's hard to see my Mom and grandparents across the yard. That's when a large grey female wolf comes up beside me. She says I fought well with her pup, and I have potential. She tells me now is the time to leave my human family if I want to become a wolf. The two pups with her are friendly and seem hopeful that I choose to go with them.

At this point, the dream gets strange. I move through the thick fog towards my Mom. I guess to speak with her as I decide to stay or go with the wolves. But as I get closer, I see that she is holding a baby. This confuses me. Lightning strikes, or a fire is started somehow. The baby is badly burned and injured. I'm frightened. Mom is also scared and crying. I think I try to talk to her, but she doesn't hear me or see me.

At this point, I decide I no longer have a place with my Mom or the people I've known. I don't belong there any more, and I follow the wolves. I recall howling in the dream. It was probably during this time. The grey female becomes my new mother, and she teaches me all I need to know.

Another part of the dream occurs during a hunt. The female and I are in a meadow. We have been unable to catch anything for a couple days, and we are hungry. The female tells me to be quiet and patient. She tells me to listen to the grass and the plants around us. They would help us locate the pray. The Earth provides everything we need. A short while later, we are able to hear the grass moving because of hidden birds, and we eat well that day.

There are parts of this dream which are confusing. I don't understand the whole thing, but other parts seem very important. There are lessons to be remembered, and I believe it means some major changes might happen in my life soon.

Wolf Daughter
May 1, 2008

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