ulfrvif | Entries tagged with ulfrvif

In celebration of Therianthropy Day, November 23, 2018, I'm proud to release this cinematic poem. Available on Youtube.

https://youtu.be/fIgfTrVwLp4

Current Mood: happy

While we don't feel completely human and don't feel like we belong, I got a good reminder of why we (Therians) can not live like the species we would prefer to be. I got a tough reminder that I am not on an animal's level. We are all still human too.

However, me getting bitten by a dog was partially my fault. I should have given him more space. I should have known the situation was over sooner. I was the one who continued to be too aggressive. I kind of blame it on being in a mental shift and forgetting that I could not handle the situation the way another canine would. This is not my first injury from having a disagreement with a dog, but I hope it will be my last. My injuries are minor, but they could have been much worse.

Please learn to control your shifts. Don't growl at just any dog, or make threatening gestures towards animals. Some of them will respond in kind and/or charge. I was trying to catch this dog and return him to his owner. I didn't think he would respond by biting me. I held on to his collar and did return him. But he was still growling at me, so I put my hand over his nose the way a wolf scolds another wolf by biting the nose. This got me bitten again instead of proving that I was tougher. I should have returned him to his kennel and walked away to let us both cool off. Unfamiliar domesticated animals and wild animals are unpredictable.

Please learn from my mistake. Do not think that you can be an alpha of a wolf pack. Do not think that you can dominate a wild animal. Human bodies do not have the strength to compete with most other large animals. We can not move and fight the way they can.

Has this made me question my Therianthropy? Yes. Briefly. But I say again that it was a mental shift that got me into this trouble. And afterwards, I tilted my head at my mate in a comical way, trying to relieve some tension. I also blame myself for not being able to read the situation better. Just because we claim to identify as an animal, that doesn’t mean we can read their body language in every situation. Some personal family stuff has me on edge, and that was coming out. Instead of staying calm, I got angry. But my frustration with my family wasn't the dog's problem.

Thankfully, this morning, the dogs seems to have forgotten our scuffle. He was friendly towards me and wanted to play when he saw me.

Ulfrivf

March 13, 2018

Current Mood: contemplative

This is why I personally see no need for “Therian Gear”. The sensation of canine ears is fairly common, and feeling a tail is almost always present. I think a fake tail would only be a distraction from sensing my phantom shifts. And wolves don’t have two tails. Also, it looks like to me, most fake ears are on top of the head. As a human, the phantom canine ears are an extension of my human ears, which are on the sides of my head. The height of my wolf ears does not go over the crest of my human head. Even on a wolf, the ears are really coming off the side of the head. I can’t deny my human anatomy during my shifts. My shifts are a blending of wolf and human. Again, most fake ears appear to give people two sets of ears when they wear them.

The tail, ears, and fur are just drawn onto the photo. I don’t have any desire to express my phantom shifts in any outwardly physical way such as with gear. I prefer to be stealthy and blend in with mainstream people.

- Ulfrvif

On Saturday, May 20, 2017 my mate and I found ourselves lost in North Dakota. We were in the right city, and close to our destination, but we couldn't find the correct apartment. We do not carry a cell phone for various reasons, but we did have a laptop. We found wifi and sent our contact a message. Soon, we were located and rescued by Wolfmage who led us to his home.

A Feast and Games

Shortly afterwards, we met up with Russian and his partner at their place. They had an extraordinary amount of food prepare for us. Pork tenderloin, and a whole chicken cooked to perfection in Russian's smoker. There was also biscuits and baked potatoes. Bax and I were weary and hungry from our 8 hour drive. I didn't have the mind to take photos of all of this delicious food, but it still won't be forgotten.

We played “Exploding Kittens” and “Cards Against Humanity”. I'd never played “Exploding Kittens” before, but I had beginner's luck. I actually won. I was so distracted by the games and my new surroundings that I almost missed out on my first tasting of the famous drink that Wolfmage had been telling us about. But I stole my mate's glass. More about that in a moment.

Wolf Therians Hunt for Breakfast

On Sunday morning, Wolfmage, Bax, and I went to both an IHOP and a Perkins, but the wait was very long at both. Rather than deal with the crowds, I volunteered to cook breakfast. So, next was a trip to a grocery store where Wolfmage bought bacon, biscuits, eggs, and sausage. I enjoyed cooking, and we we all had an awesome breakfast. The bacon was thick-cut! We just chilled for a while until Russian was available to meet us at our next location.

Mead Tasting

The sweet golden liquid flowed genially from the prairie rose and in many tantalizing flavours. Mead is older than beer. It's an ancient drink made of honey, water, and yeast. Other fruits and spices can be added for flavor during the fermentation process.

There is often discussion about how Therianthropy and alcohol do not mix. I used to think that when younger, but I'm wiser now. Like everything else about Therianthropy, that depends on the individual. Sometimes, I feel more shifted or shift easier when intoxicated, but other times it has no affect.

After purchasing a few samples of flavors and a tour around the facility, the owner of the meadery decided to keep handing us sample of flavors that we had not tried. The first samples had been small shot-glasses - ginger, star anise, pineapple chipolte, mint, and more. The free samples were full-sized wine glasses - plum, cherry, and raspberry. I left there drunk for sure. But mead is a good kind of drunk. It's warm and relaxing. Mead is friendly and inviting. It's also the drink of the Gods. Bax and I purchased a bottle of Traditional, Vanilla Cinnamon, and Chocolate Orange. I think most alcoholic drinks that are chocolate flavoured are disgusting. This mead was perfection.

Interview

Now that we'd all had some alcohol to loosen the nerves and stifle the inhibitions, we recorded the video for the Therian Nation interview. That's available on Youtube.

Food, Dessert, and More Drinks!

It was into the afternoon now, and time for dinner. We chose a Mongolian buffet to eat at. It was interesting to watch my food be grilled, though I did not add enough sauce to my noodles. It was still tasty though.

Russian and his partner insisted that we go to a nearby Irish Pub for the dessert. I'm so glad they did. I won't forget that bread pudding with whisky sauce or the Irish Cream Cake for some time yet. Both were absolutely amazing! There was more Therianthropy chat. The atmosphere of the pub was nice, and I couldn't resist trying their pear cider. It was nice and refreshing.

Sadly, we needed to part ways with Russian and his partner. We enjoyed Wolfmage's company another night before leaving early in the morning. It was a good Howl. I've accomplished a couple goals on this trip. I've met other Therianthropes in person and I was also allowed to interview them. Thanks for all of the wonderful memories, Wolfmage and Russian!

Current Mood: Drunk

The mate and I were just in Alabama for a couple of weeks to visit my family. We ate a lot of fresh catfish and venison. We also attended a couple Mardi Gras parades. Seeing my family was nice. It was on the way back to Ontario when we had the real, unexpected adventure. We didn’t want to drive through Nashville traffic, so our GPS picked an alternate route that took us to Chicago, Illinois - where one of our brake calipers decided to come unattached to the bracket that held it in place and stop working. We managed to get out of the heavy traffic and into a parking lot before the loose brake caliper locked up our wheel.

Everyone we spoke to was very kind to us in Chicago. We’d stopped not far away from a mechanic’s shop, but he didn’t specialize in Volkswagens, so he gave us the address for the shop we should go to. We called a tow truck, and the driver was very nice and helpful.

An assistant manager took care of us at the Volkswagen repair shop, and he even called a couple hotels to help us find a place that would allow us to take our dog. The repair shop had a shuttle that took us to the hotel too and picked us up when the car was fixed. That’s customer service and hospitality! Our car was fixed by the next morning, but we just parked it in the nearest parkade and stayed another night.

We enjoyed walking and exploring the city around our hotel. We didn’t wander too far for fear of getting lost in the maze, but we found our way to Millennium Park and the trails along the harbor. Then we took the River Walk back along the Chicago River to our hotel. Seeing some of the old buildings and architecture among the newer skyscrapers was fascinating.

We got to eat a deep dish pizza and some Chicago BBQ and burgers. We experienced the sound of the L trains in the city. There really is literally a Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts on every block. Finding the 24 hour Dunkin’ Donuts was a challenge when it got later in the evening. We had to walk by three or four of them that were closed, but we did find it. A couple popular restaurant chains are also on every city block. Within 7 or 8 blocks from our hotel, we could have eaten anything from hotdogs to Mediterranean to Greek or Asian or Middle Eastern, and a large variety of other foods. There were also grocery stores nearby, and all of these restaurants and stores were on the first level of these giant skyscrapers. I think a person could live in Chicago for a long time and always find somewhere new to eat or something new to experience.

What could have been a very scary and frustrating experience turned out to be a wonderful, unexpected stop during our trip thanks to all of the generous people that we met. Chicago was a very large city that I actually wouldn’t mind visiting again.

-Ulfrvif

This was shared as part of Therian Nation.

The related video is available.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19UCVej1Wu8

Hi. I’m Shannon Jackson. I’m also known as Wolf Daughter in the Therian community. Recently, I took on the name Ulfrvif (Wolf Woman).

I’m 30 years old. I attended 5 years of university to earn a BFA in graphic design and painting. I’m currently working full time in that field as a graphic designer and printer assistant. My hobbies include hiking, camping, and canoeing. I enjoy being out in the remote wilderness. I enjoy archery. I also practice HEMA (Historical European Martial Arts), with the main focus currently being on the German longsword.

I am a Wolf Therianthrope. My life is not entirely human. I consider myself to be both spiritually and psychologically a wolf. I think spirit works through and with the physical body, including the brain. I interpret aspects of my mentality and behavior as wolf. I have identified as a Wolf Therianthrope for 17-18 years, since I was 12-13 years old. I’ve never felt like I quite fit in with humans. But I can’t deny that I’m also human. That’s very obvious.

Therianthropy is about existing in two different worlds at the same time. It’s about having two different perspectives on life. I’m human and I’m something else. I actually think it’s really important. The world needs multiple perspectives and diversity. It’d be a really boring place if everybody thought the same, and experienced the same things.

For me, personally, Therianthropy is not about wearing ears, and tails, and looking cute. For me, being a Wolf Therianthrope is about personal power and inner strength. It’s about perseverance in difficult times. For example, wolves can go a long time without eating. It’s about survival. Being wolf is just about raw existence. It is a connection to nature, and a deeper, integral, and instinctual part of myself, the animal within. For me, it means to be tough and rugged. My life hasn’t been kind or easy, and I wouldn’t be alive today, if it wasn’t for tapping into that instinctual part of myself.

Therianthropy does makes navigating and interacting within the human world a bit harder for me. I think Katmandu said it really well in the A.H.W.W FAQ from 1994.

“We exist in the human world, but long to seek connections with the animal one. We cannot completely leave the human world, nor completely enter the animal one. We are in-between, half animal and half human in psyche…mental or spiritual, shapechangers.”

Wolves are elusive creatures who are wary of humans. This causes me to have some anxiety. Although, wolves are also curious creatures. Being fearful of and inquisitive about people at the same time is a strange dichotomy. It’s a challenge in and of itself that I must deal with every day, but Therianthropy is not about shying away from responsibility. Being a Therianthrope is about taking on life’s challenges head-on with determination.

How do I know that I’m wolf? I seem to be more alert and aware of my surroundings. I’m more attentive to the information that my senses are bringing in. I watch, listen, and smell is also important. The calls and body language of other animals and humans are important.

Think of it this way–humans use phones to constantly be connected to the internet and that web of information. A wolf’s senses and awareness keep it plugged into the environment and all of that information that is available. A tremendous amount of communication takes place in nature between the plants, animals, and the environment.

When I say that Therianthropy is about personal power and raw instinct, it’s also about learning to control and balance that with being human. We can’t escape being human. We have to accept that part of ourselves too. It’s really hard to sum up all of this in a few minutes. It’s really impossible, and everyone has a slightly different experience. But I hope that gives you an idea of what my life is like as a Wolf Therianthrope. Thanks for reading.

Wolf Daughter/Ulfrvif